mar. 4th, '24 — removed dream journal and tech page due to inactive use. considering remodeling the site again for more simplicity.

feb. 11, '24 — finally wrote something for my writing page [gasp]. updated music obsession.

feb. 10, '24 — new art added to the digital art page. new journal entries. created the dream journal page.

feb. 9, '24 — new journal entry. created the 'tech' page, which i may or may not keep up.

feb. 7, '24 — new journal entry. updated writing page.

feb. 5, '24 — new journal entry. updated the art page and astrology page.

feb. 3, '24 — added a disclaimer for the bookshelf page and credit for the lace borders cuz i forgot.

feb. 2, '24 — bookshelf page created. new astrology entry. updated current music obsession. small tweaks on other pages.

jan. 28, '24 — new journal entry.

jan. 27, '24 — updated the shrine page, which is still a WIP. new journal entry.

jan. 26, '24 — created the astrology page.

jan. 25, '24 — updated the music page and the about page.

jan. 24, '24 — added a music page that got a bit verbose. 🗿 i ain't taking it down tho. oh, and new journal entry, fixed the 'before you enter' page, and added mobile adaptability.

jan. 22, '24 — version 2.0 launched. super happy for what i did, took the whole weekend to build it.

thank you to Simon @ Solaria for the lace borders and tutorial.

current music obsession

last edited: february 4th, 2024

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i don't care about cloud computing

february 5th, 2024 @ 12:20 am

currently listening to: I Should Have Kissed You by One Direction

Started my online classes for a microbachelor's and it's been kind of frustrating because the quizzes are so easy but it doesn't align at all with the videos given. It feels like a scam. Also I don't care about cloud computing. You could pay me to though.

Anyway, while I was tweaking the art page here, I added a list of some of my favourite artists and I had to take a moment to admire awanqi's work. My GOD... every time I see her paintings I'm always floored. This one time when I was doing my usual browsing of her website, I started to tear up. Like her work is so fucking gorgeous I can't help it sometimes. I gotta step up my game. I wish I could paint like her. I know it's all practice. Her understanding of folds and texture is insane. Master level. Top tier.

I also remember when I used to use tiktok more frequently, I would sometimes gush on my story about artists I loved. I was going thru a moment, gushing over awanqi's work yet again, and was saying how much it moved me. Then I got a notification of someone saying something along the lines of, "that's how I feel about your work." it made my day tbh.

UNTILLLL, i saw they were actually replying to one of their friends in the comments of my own story lol. they weren't talking about my work at all. and even worse, i replied to them all excited saying "tysmm" or whatever, and then I saw the compliment wasn't for me. worst moment of my life hands down. i've never wanted to shoot myself more than in that moment.

im being dramatic again but the embarrassment was just that strong. every day i am humbled.

Anyway, I'm in a better mood than I was a few days ago. I think I might actually do something creative even though I am tired right now and should go to bed unless I want to ruin my sleep schedule again. I slept in a bit today. Sundays are always slow and boring. I wish humans were nocturnal. It feels like a joke to have the biology to feel more energized at night in a world where everyone has a normal biological clock. It's even worse when I also have seasonal depression because I'm not getting enough vitamin D, so I have to take vitamin D tablets to keep myself from feeling like death.

God I can't wait until spring.